Hey Mom
I can't sleep due to a whopping headache, so I sit at the computer at 3 a.m. I remember that this is the anniversay of mom's death.....29 years later...wow.....at times it seems like 5 years ago. (It is also my dear Uncle Vince's birthday).
So hey mom-not that you can't see from above, but let me tell you about your grandchildren....(anyone else-feel free to skip to next blogging....which will hopefully happen before I turn 42....way too much time in between blogs.)
Brendan - he looks so McAvoyish....what a handsome and good person he is. He doesn't like to dissappoint me (can you imagine-a 16 year old who is mature enough to show he cares about his mom?) The other day he whisked in and out of the house again and as he was on his way out I said, "Gee Bren....you have this great social life, but I miss you around here." After I said it, I felt guilty because I felt like I was putting out the old guilt trip, and then I figured it fell on deaf ears....but he all of a sudden reappeared in the room and gave me this huge hug and said he loved me. That was probably one of the best mom moments ever. He also worries about me. Last year when my abdomen pains were so bad (up in my bedroom-silently hanging out) that I had to call Grandpa to bring me to the ER, as I came down the stairs, barely walking, he jumped up and said, "Mom...what's the matter"? He is the one who would come home and talk about how upset he got that other kids were being bullied or picked on by students and/or teachers. He has a HUGE heart. He does not try real hard at school....maybe a sense of applying himself didn't get him far earlier on. He is not at the top of the class or the bottom of the class and never a disturbance at school, so I can tell you from my educational experience....academically, he fell through the cracks. But he made some great descisions for himself once he got to high school. He chose a tech school; he chose to go back to public high school and realized it wasn't the right fit, so was strong enough to ask to go back to tech school again....they took him and he worked through a tough transition year only to end up an honors student all of this year. He has the girls all the time. He is still called to hang out with an old girlfriend from another town, and he complies "as friends" at times; he was the one out of a group of like 5 guys to go with a friend, who is a girl (has hung out with the guys for 10 years)to her Senior prom; the girls swoon over him....I had a girl at my high school leave my office, go back to the classroom and was overheard by the teacher as saying, "Mrs.Reed's son is hot".....he has a way of getting to know girls in all towns (I guess facebook and cell phones help kids with that these days). You would have LOVED Brendan.....great sense of humor....just a great kid. He never does anything really wrong....the worst (that I know of that he has done-and I know I can't know everything) is harmless in most people's book. He takes his driving test tomorrow, so keep an eye out for him! I'm not sure what his future holds, but next year he is a Senior and I will miss him sooooo much if he goes away to college. He wants to major in business-cool, I guess...personally, I think he would be a great PE teacher-great way with little kids. oh well-they have to live it through themselves. Oh...forgot to mention how athletic he is-any sport --amazing.
Connor - wow-what a bundle of ability and personality......very good looking kid-not in a McAvoy way, but in a Reed way....looks very much like Bob. Another huge heart, but he has a different way of showing it. I am amazed at how smart Connor is. He reads so much. He doesn't like fiction, but non-fiction....all kinds.....he always wants to go to the library or book store. Teachers love him because he is smart and puts in effort....what's not to love. He has had to do two mock trials through the gifted program and his teacher says he has never had a student who is so gifted at this. I have seen him in action (at home-not so fun to watch, as he plays his lawyer role...arguing with any and everything.) and in his mock trials. His ability to reason and think out the other side are amazing....of course when he is being the adolescent at home...thinking out the other side is more of a challenge to him. He and Katie argue all the time (very competitive-both of them). I hope they grow out of this because it hurts to see how not nice they can be to each other. I guess I see that as a parenting failure-not sure why-most would just call it sibling rivalry. He loves Keera, but I think there is some jealousy there too.....he was so attached to me when he was really young...the same as Keera was. He is very, very sensitive and has an extreme (over the top a little) idea of what is just and injust (at least when it comes to his life).He could be on his way to being 1st or 2nd in his class. As a freshmen he is taking AP history, honors math, honors English, science....an incredible stress load for him,but he refused to not take the challenges....great writer...he won a contest one year in town for Martin Luther King day ceremony. He also has athletic ability and his mind gets all the strategies involved in every game...he loves baseball, just like his Dad. Connor has this ability to get what he wants....as challenging as that is to be his parent for this...it is a pleasure to see him at work outside the house. For example...he wanted quotes from baseball writers.....so he sent out letters or emails...next thing we know, the Boston Globe guy calls to give Connor the information he wanted....a reporter from the Boston globe calling Connor?? This kid is going to make anything he wants happen in life. His determination and motivation are at an all time high. I kind of wish that he and Brendan were separated by a sister in age because they are so different from each other that it is hard for them to find common ground in getting along....with the exception of teasing Katie. Connor loves to read, Brendan hates to read....etc. Connor has had some trying situations in life too...he had a speech impediment as a young child, and he still feels it today. Of course he did so well in school that they discontinued his services after first grade, even though he continued to struggle a little with it. I barely hear it today, but I think it bothers him at times because he knows it is there. He is very anxious (who wouldn't be with all that going on inside of him) and has ADD. It is not as easy to be Connor, as it looks. He also has girls swooning over him. His smile, which I see a lot more now than ever before, would melt hearts. He really, really cares about people, but he has this tough exterior to him, which makes me sad. Somewhere along the line, he learned to build a wall around him (of course again that is due to faulty parenting on mom's part....that's the way I see it...I'll workon that). Tough exterior is okay, as long as you let people in. He sent me a text the other day that said, "I know I don't always appreciate what you do or say I love you enough, but I love you." Wow-not bad for a 14 year old boy. I hope he knows how much I love him. He will be a shining star in his life and many others.
My girls - Katie - wow-what a beautiful young lady she is. She said something funny yesterday that I probably shouldn't post, but it is something that will crack me up years from now.....we were buying a bathing suit for her....two piece, covering what it should, but not a whole lot more...I suppose while you're young and cellulite free, you might as well flaunt it. I said to her (because I didn't see it on her) "are you sure that covers everything?" She said, "yes mom-it's a large....people say I have a big butt and big boobs." I automatically go on the defensive and say, "Who says that?" She said, "Everyone". I started to get worried and said, "That isn't nice." She said, "Mom, they say it in a good way." I think she is right....she has a cute figure....not too skinny, just right for her age....a very healthy body image-thank goodness. Katie is extremely smart also....school seems effortless to her. She gets straight A's and she gets along with everyone...except her Spanish teacher, who says she chats too much. I take Katie's side on this one....the teacher just doesn't appreciate her....so mom like-right? Katie is about as well rounded as they get.....there isn't anything she isn't good at. She has an easy going approach to things and she gets along so well with her father-very much daddy's little girl. She has already run into things growing up that I didn't have a mom to turn to about....so at times, I think she has learned things on her own. There's that mother guilt....I didn't know things because I didn't have a mom, so I am not being much of a mom by not being able to help my daughter. I think she just does her thing and finds out by talking to her 17 year old female cousin or going on the internet. She knows how to use her resources to find what she needs. She had boyfriends for like 2 or 3 years straight, but it has been about a half of a year or so since she has been interested in anyone. That is fine with me-one less thing for me to worry about. Katie is about as teenagerish as possible right now. She has all the right answers and she will not admit to needing mom at all (not that she does). She is so independent and not a cuddly one like Keera is...which is also why she was so easy growing up because nothing phased her at all. I know she loves me, but showing it will have to wait a few years. I look at her and I wonder where the years went....from my "curly girly" with her cute little curly hair to this beautiful young lady before me. I only hope and pray to God that I will have many more years to watch my kids' lives than you did Mom. Katie received her teachers for next year and while she is told they are the nicest ones, that worries her that they won't prepare her for high school....little does she know that she will prepare herself and could probably shoot right for college, never mind high school. She is a good sister to Keera and Keera adores her....she has it tough with Connor-teased a lot, but she dishes it out verbally sometimes. She has always held her own with those two brothers.
Keera - last but will never allow herself to be least. She still ends up in our bed every night-between Bob and I. She still calls my name periodically if I leave a room....believe it or not, she is socially adjusted at school-doesn't go looking for mom, crying or getting in trouble, but at home, she wants mom all the time. She has really bonded with Bob while he was home this year. One of Grandpa's favorite stories is how he went to home depot one day last fall and there was Bob picking out supplies to work on a room in the house, while Keera held a plastic pole for Bob-bigger than herself. She was helping Dad, she said. She has a face that would cause angels to sing, but don't let her fool you because she can be filled with the Irish little devil at the same time. She'll love you one minute and the next forget you are there or give you some teenager remark (not her fault she lives with 3 teenagers). She is smart too....we will see how she does with school. We started her at 4 and Bob wanted to keep her back, but the school says she is ready for 1st grade this coming year. I think she had an advantage with older siblings to guide her socially (or push her)and emotionally. Her vocabulary is amazing-the things she comes out with sometimes. She is constantly keeping up with her bros and sis....when they have friends over, she tries to get right in the middle of it. Everyone who grew up with the other three know her and like her...she's like a natural addition to each of the other kids. She is also sensitive...she tells of stories of kids crying on the bus or at school and how she tried to help. (But here is a natural statement for Keera from us..."You aren't the one who made them cry, are you?"...that just gives you an idea of Keera...and the answer was always no-believable too...like Emily cried because Sarah wanted Keera to sit with her on the bus and Keera did sit with Sarah. So Keera told Emily she would go back to sitting with her the next day - good problem solver for five year old!) She started t-ball this year and that was interesting in itself-see previous blog, has been riding a scooter since she was like two and her bike with no training wheels this year is a new addition. She does not stop-ever-it is like she has batteries that won't come out-if she isn't moving, she's talking or singing....she starts at like 8 in the morning-looking for mom when she wakes up-and ends at like 11 at night...she hardly sleeps at all. I don't know how God gave me the energy for this one but I do know that I would be lost without my little Keera. She is the epitome of my relationship with Bob-more love than I ever thought could exist. She will help me when I don't have the other three anymore...I just hope I am enough for her when they all go their own way in a few years.
So-how blessed am I Mom? I know you had something to do with it....your Irish eyes are smiling down. Dad, Trace and I are so close it is amazing...you would be happy with that. I wish you were here to share life with Dad....life isn't fair. But, I am so glad you were my mom...you and Dad have made the perfect family that just multiplies as time goes on....more love for the world (not that there aren't ups and downs and ins and outs and goods and bads in all of us)but for the most part....good....love ya mom-always and forever!
So hey mom-not that you can't see from above, but let me tell you about your grandchildren....(anyone else-feel free to skip to next blogging....which will hopefully happen before I turn 42....way too much time in between blogs.)
Brendan - he looks so McAvoyish....what a handsome and good person he is. He doesn't like to dissappoint me (can you imagine-a 16 year old who is mature enough to show he cares about his mom?) The other day he whisked in and out of the house again and as he was on his way out I said, "Gee Bren....you have this great social life, but I miss you around here." After I said it, I felt guilty because I felt like I was putting out the old guilt trip, and then I figured it fell on deaf ears....but he all of a sudden reappeared in the room and gave me this huge hug and said he loved me. That was probably one of the best mom moments ever. He also worries about me. Last year when my abdomen pains were so bad (up in my bedroom-silently hanging out) that I had to call Grandpa to bring me to the ER, as I came down the stairs, barely walking, he jumped up and said, "Mom...what's the matter"? He is the one who would come home and talk about how upset he got that other kids were being bullied or picked on by students and/or teachers. He has a HUGE heart. He does not try real hard at school....maybe a sense of applying himself didn't get him far earlier on. He is not at the top of the class or the bottom of the class and never a disturbance at school, so I can tell you from my educational experience....academically, he fell through the cracks. But he made some great descisions for himself once he got to high school. He chose a tech school; he chose to go back to public high school and realized it wasn't the right fit, so was strong enough to ask to go back to tech school again....they took him and he worked through a tough transition year only to end up an honors student all of this year. He has the girls all the time. He is still called to hang out with an old girlfriend from another town, and he complies "as friends" at times; he was the one out of a group of like 5 guys to go with a friend, who is a girl (has hung out with the guys for 10 years)to her Senior prom; the girls swoon over him....I had a girl at my high school leave my office, go back to the classroom and was overheard by the teacher as saying, "Mrs.Reed's son is hot".....he has a way of getting to know girls in all towns (I guess facebook and cell phones help kids with that these days). You would have LOVED Brendan.....great sense of humor....just a great kid. He never does anything really wrong....the worst (that I know of that he has done-and I know I can't know everything) is harmless in most people's book. He takes his driving test tomorrow, so keep an eye out for him! I'm not sure what his future holds, but next year he is a Senior and I will miss him sooooo much if he goes away to college. He wants to major in business-cool, I guess...personally, I think he would be a great PE teacher-great way with little kids. oh well-they have to live it through themselves. Oh...forgot to mention how athletic he is-any sport --amazing.
Connor - wow-what a bundle of ability and personality......very good looking kid-not in a McAvoy way, but in a Reed way....looks very much like Bob. Another huge heart, but he has a different way of showing it. I am amazed at how smart Connor is. He reads so much. He doesn't like fiction, but non-fiction....all kinds.....he always wants to go to the library or book store. Teachers love him because he is smart and puts in effort....what's not to love. He has had to do two mock trials through the gifted program and his teacher says he has never had a student who is so gifted at this. I have seen him in action (at home-not so fun to watch, as he plays his lawyer role...arguing with any and everything.) and in his mock trials. His ability to reason and think out the other side are amazing....of course when he is being the adolescent at home...thinking out the other side is more of a challenge to him. He and Katie argue all the time (very competitive-both of them). I hope they grow out of this because it hurts to see how not nice they can be to each other. I guess I see that as a parenting failure-not sure why-most would just call it sibling rivalry. He loves Keera, but I think there is some jealousy there too.....he was so attached to me when he was really young...the same as Keera was. He is very, very sensitive and has an extreme (over the top a little) idea of what is just and injust (at least when it comes to his life).He could be on his way to being 1st or 2nd in his class. As a freshmen he is taking AP history, honors math, honors English, science....an incredible stress load for him,but he refused to not take the challenges....great writer...he won a contest one year in town for Martin Luther King day ceremony. He also has athletic ability and his mind gets all the strategies involved in every game...he loves baseball, just like his Dad. Connor has this ability to get what he wants....as challenging as that is to be his parent for this...it is a pleasure to see him at work outside the house. For example...he wanted quotes from baseball writers.....so he sent out letters or emails...next thing we know, the Boston Globe guy calls to give Connor the information he wanted....a reporter from the Boston globe calling Connor?? This kid is going to make anything he wants happen in life. His determination and motivation are at an all time high. I kind of wish that he and Brendan were separated by a sister in age because they are so different from each other that it is hard for them to find common ground in getting along....with the exception of teasing Katie. Connor loves to read, Brendan hates to read....etc. Connor has had some trying situations in life too...he had a speech impediment as a young child, and he still feels it today. Of course he did so well in school that they discontinued his services after first grade, even though he continued to struggle a little with it. I barely hear it today, but I think it bothers him at times because he knows it is there. He is very anxious (who wouldn't be with all that going on inside of him) and has ADD. It is not as easy to be Connor, as it looks. He also has girls swooning over him. His smile, which I see a lot more now than ever before, would melt hearts. He really, really cares about people, but he has this tough exterior to him, which makes me sad. Somewhere along the line, he learned to build a wall around him (of course again that is due to faulty parenting on mom's part....that's the way I see it...I'll workon that). Tough exterior is okay, as long as you let people in. He sent me a text the other day that said, "I know I don't always appreciate what you do or say I love you enough, but I love you." Wow-not bad for a 14 year old boy. I hope he knows how much I love him. He will be a shining star in his life and many others.
My girls - Katie - wow-what a beautiful young lady she is. She said something funny yesterday that I probably shouldn't post, but it is something that will crack me up years from now.....we were buying a bathing suit for her....two piece, covering what it should, but not a whole lot more...I suppose while you're young and cellulite free, you might as well flaunt it. I said to her (because I didn't see it on her) "are you sure that covers everything?" She said, "yes mom-it's a large....people say I have a big butt and big boobs." I automatically go on the defensive and say, "Who says that?" She said, "Everyone". I started to get worried and said, "That isn't nice." She said, "Mom, they say it in a good way." I think she is right....she has a cute figure....not too skinny, just right for her age....a very healthy body image-thank goodness. Katie is extremely smart also....school seems effortless to her. She gets straight A's and she gets along with everyone...except her Spanish teacher, who says she chats too much. I take Katie's side on this one....the teacher just doesn't appreciate her....so mom like-right? Katie is about as well rounded as they get.....there isn't anything she isn't good at. She has an easy going approach to things and she gets along so well with her father-very much daddy's little girl. She has already run into things growing up that I didn't have a mom to turn to about....so at times, I think she has learned things on her own. There's that mother guilt....I didn't know things because I didn't have a mom, so I am not being much of a mom by not being able to help my daughter. I think she just does her thing and finds out by talking to her 17 year old female cousin or going on the internet. She knows how to use her resources to find what she needs. She had boyfriends for like 2 or 3 years straight, but it has been about a half of a year or so since she has been interested in anyone. That is fine with me-one less thing for me to worry about. Katie is about as teenagerish as possible right now. She has all the right answers and she will not admit to needing mom at all (not that she does). She is so independent and not a cuddly one like Keera is...which is also why she was so easy growing up because nothing phased her at all. I know she loves me, but showing it will have to wait a few years. I look at her and I wonder where the years went....from my "curly girly" with her cute little curly hair to this beautiful young lady before me. I only hope and pray to God that I will have many more years to watch my kids' lives than you did Mom. Katie received her teachers for next year and while she is told they are the nicest ones, that worries her that they won't prepare her for high school....little does she know that she will prepare herself and could probably shoot right for college, never mind high school. She is a good sister to Keera and Keera adores her....she has it tough with Connor-teased a lot, but she dishes it out verbally sometimes. She has always held her own with those two brothers.
Keera - last but will never allow herself to be least. She still ends up in our bed every night-between Bob and I. She still calls my name periodically if I leave a room....believe it or not, she is socially adjusted at school-doesn't go looking for mom, crying or getting in trouble, but at home, she wants mom all the time. She has really bonded with Bob while he was home this year. One of Grandpa's favorite stories is how he went to home depot one day last fall and there was Bob picking out supplies to work on a room in the house, while Keera held a plastic pole for Bob-bigger than herself. She was helping Dad, she said. She has a face that would cause angels to sing, but don't let her fool you because she can be filled with the Irish little devil at the same time. She'll love you one minute and the next forget you are there or give you some teenager remark (not her fault she lives with 3 teenagers). She is smart too....we will see how she does with school. We started her at 4 and Bob wanted to keep her back, but the school says she is ready for 1st grade this coming year. I think she had an advantage with older siblings to guide her socially (or push her)and emotionally. Her vocabulary is amazing-the things she comes out with sometimes. She is constantly keeping up with her bros and sis....when they have friends over, she tries to get right in the middle of it. Everyone who grew up with the other three know her and like her...she's like a natural addition to each of the other kids. She is also sensitive...she tells of stories of kids crying on the bus or at school and how she tried to help. (But here is a natural statement for Keera from us..."You aren't the one who made them cry, are you?"...that just gives you an idea of Keera...and the answer was always no-believable too...like Emily cried because Sarah wanted Keera to sit with her on the bus and Keera did sit with Sarah. So Keera told Emily she would go back to sitting with her the next day - good problem solver for five year old!) She started t-ball this year and that was interesting in itself-see previous blog, has been riding a scooter since she was like two and her bike with no training wheels this year is a new addition. She does not stop-ever-it is like she has batteries that won't come out-if she isn't moving, she's talking or singing....she starts at like 8 in the morning-looking for mom when she wakes up-and ends at like 11 at night...she hardly sleeps at all. I don't know how God gave me the energy for this one but I do know that I would be lost without my little Keera. She is the epitome of my relationship with Bob-more love than I ever thought could exist. She will help me when I don't have the other three anymore...I just hope I am enough for her when they all go their own way in a few years.
So-how blessed am I Mom? I know you had something to do with it....your Irish eyes are smiling down. Dad, Trace and I are so close it is amazing...you would be happy with that. I wish you were here to share life with Dad....life isn't fair. But, I am so glad you were my mom...you and Dad have made the perfect family that just multiplies as time goes on....more love for the world (not that there aren't ups and downs and ins and outs and goods and bads in all of us)but for the most part....good....love ya mom-always and forever!
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