Excitement, worry, not sure
So...I have been through a number of interviews this year for about five different districts, in an attempt to find a principal position. Not sure what my drive is, but I seem to have an internal drive I can't shut off. It is motivated by boredom of what I know do, my seven-eight year itch to move/have kids/be a coach/paint rooms/change jobs/etc..., frustration with the system I am in and how it works, a desire to try to change the world in some way, and maybe a slight desire to be in control (I think most admin's have that-although for an admin, I am pretty much not a controller at all, compared to others).
At any rate, I have run the gammit of applying to systems that are falling apart (one lost a superintendent, principal and assistant principal all within a few months because the BOE is so bad, I guess). So that was a blessing in disguise. Another one was just a complimentary interview because my superintendent made a phone call-waste of everyone's time, one was for a town that went out three different times and ended up hiring from within-weird, the other four were honestly not bad, but in 2-3 of them, I know politics played a role in what was happening.
At any rate, that brings me to my last interview which was last week. I left the interview process with the superintendent, who has been in three systems as a superintendent for 25 years and is now retired and an interim, for 2 years, at this district, but has been asked to stay on because he is so good. So I am pretty sure there aren't a lot of politics involved in his decision making because he basically doesn't need the job and they love him. As we were walking out he told me I did a fabulous job and that I was by far the best of the six people.
I cannot tell you how good that felt. It was heartfelt, it was sincere, it was not political, it was what I needed. I have heard, you are great but not the right fit; you have all the right answers, but not the confidence; you are great but don't present like a principal. This was the comment I needed to feel good about myself (silly-I guess I shouldn't need that comment, but really, we all need some sort of self confirming input and I haven't really had any in five years from my system). I head back on Monday for another interview but have only told like three people because this interview is with all BOE members and you never know where that can go. You hope they listen to a superintendent, but who knows.
Of course all of the scary thoughts are now in play...what have I done? Am I ready? Is my family ready? I was bound to get something with the way I was applying like crazy-will they really like me? I will be leaving all kinds of people I love to work with? etc, etc. Well I have to put all of those thoughts aside and go in and do the best I can Monday. I think for sure that God chooses where we need to be and what we need to do. If this is right, it will happen and if not, there must be some other opportunity waiting for me.
I just wanted to blog so that I could remember if this was some momentous turning point in my life and what I was feeling.....I am starting to kind of get excited too...I want to just enjoy the time of not knowing.
At any rate, I have run the gammit of applying to systems that are falling apart (one lost a superintendent, principal and assistant principal all within a few months because the BOE is so bad, I guess). So that was a blessing in disguise. Another one was just a complimentary interview because my superintendent made a phone call-waste of everyone's time, one was for a town that went out three different times and ended up hiring from within-weird, the other four were honestly not bad, but in 2-3 of them, I know politics played a role in what was happening.
At any rate, that brings me to my last interview which was last week. I left the interview process with the superintendent, who has been in three systems as a superintendent for 25 years and is now retired and an interim, for 2 years, at this district, but has been asked to stay on because he is so good. So I am pretty sure there aren't a lot of politics involved in his decision making because he basically doesn't need the job and they love him. As we were walking out he told me I did a fabulous job and that I was by far the best of the six people.
I cannot tell you how good that felt. It was heartfelt, it was sincere, it was not political, it was what I needed. I have heard, you are great but not the right fit; you have all the right answers, but not the confidence; you are great but don't present like a principal. This was the comment I needed to feel good about myself (silly-I guess I shouldn't need that comment, but really, we all need some sort of self confirming input and I haven't really had any in five years from my system). I head back on Monday for another interview but have only told like three people because this interview is with all BOE members and you never know where that can go. You hope they listen to a superintendent, but who knows.
Of course all of the scary thoughts are now in play...what have I done? Am I ready? Is my family ready? I was bound to get something with the way I was applying like crazy-will they really like me? I will be leaving all kinds of people I love to work with? etc, etc. Well I have to put all of those thoughts aside and go in and do the best I can Monday. I think for sure that God chooses where we need to be and what we need to do. If this is right, it will happen and if not, there must be some other opportunity waiting for me.
I just wanted to blog so that I could remember if this was some momentous turning point in my life and what I was feeling.....I am starting to kind of get excited too...I want to just enjoy the time of not knowing.
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